Brett Fischer, 29, had been in contact with the seller, Jane Lawrence, for months before finally landing the listing appointment of his life. He’s had his license for two years and his price point is around $400,000, so selling a house at this price point could really help change the trajectory of his career. 

“I was shocked when she called me. She had it listed with one of the top agents in my area, but for some reason it didn’t sell.”

When Brett got to Ms. Lawrence’s house he said he was mesmerized by its condition. 

“The house was built in 1993 and it looked like nobody had ever lived there. I could literally see my reflection in the tiles.”

We asked Brett to describe the listing appointment in detail:

When I walked in I complimented the natural light and she basically interrupted me and asked me to take off my shoes. Once I did, she nudged one of my shoes with her toe so that the heels were parallel and facing the same way. Obvious red flag, but I didn’t think twice about it because I was just happy to be there. Before I even laid out my listing presentation she asked me what type of signs I put out, and how many. I was taken back by the question because I’m not really sure what the “standard” signs were called, so I just said, “the ones with the legs that opened up.” She asked if I could put out six, and noted the street corners that she wanted them placed.

Once we finally got to talking about timing she said she was going on vacation for just over a month, so I suggested we list it on September 2nd, a Friday. She lit up when I mentioned that date and told me that was perfect because it was her birthday. When I heard this my stomach dropped. I asked to use the bathroom and immediately checked my phone to confirm my suspicions. She was a virgo. My ex, Rachel, was Virgo and she also had a birthday in early September. That’s the only reason I know that. I don’t really give a shit about astrological signs or whatever but the similarities between the seller and my ex were uncanny. 

Rachel had a designated place for our car keys, and one time I “missed” the key holder and she went insane on me. She would also start violently cleaning out of nowhere, making me feel like I had to start cleaning even though the house was clean and I had already done my side of the chores. After my relationship ended with Rachel, I vowed to never be in a relationship with a Virgo again. Yeah sure, $75,000 from this listing would be a nice pop, but it isn’t worth the hell\ I would experience with another Virgo.

We at BAM will continue to update you on the trajectory of Brett’s career.