Real estate agents and salespeople often pride themselves on being excellent negotiators—a crucial skill when representing clients.
A couple of weeks ago, Byron Lazine defined what an agent is, and part of that definition is acting on behalf of somebody, or acting in their best interests. Being a tough negotiator for your clients, with a clear endgame of either securing a house or getting it sold, is undeniably effective.
But that same mindset of relentless negotiation can become detrimental when you start negotiating with yourself.
The Trap of Self-Negotiation
Humans aren’t always rational. We have the power to justify our decisions and actions, sometimes leading us down a path of self-sabotage. One of the ways this manifests is through self-negotiation—convincing ourselves that we don’t need to do what we know we should. This internal dialogue can be the most challenging battle you’ll face in your real estate career.
The Three Types of People
When talking about self-negotiation, there are three types of people:
- The Doers: These individuals tackle hard tasks head-on, believing that the work itself is the reward. They keep commitments to themselves, exercise discipline, and refuse to negotiate with the part of them that seeks comfort or distraction.
- The Delayed Gratifiers: This group is willing to do the hard work but only after promising themselves a reward of something more enjoyable later. They conduct a successful negotiation with themselves, delaying gratification until the job is done.
- The Procrastinators: These people reward themselves upfront, with the promise of doing the work sometime in the future. Unfortunately, this often leads to tasks being delayed indefinitely, sacrificing long-term goals for short-term comfort.
Why High Achievers Don’t Negotiate with Themselves
The highest achievers leave no room for internal negotiation. Understand that immediate gratification often gets in the way of your goals, your beliefs, your values—it’s nothing but self-sabotage.
Instead of indulging in comfort or distractions, high achievers prioritize discipline and commitment to their tasks. They know that doing what needs to be done first will lead to better outcomes, even if the reward comes later.
In contrast, think about how easy it is to just rationalize, “Oh, I don’t really need to do this today.” This approach seeks instant gratification without considering the consequences for your future self.
The Power of Routine and Discipline
So, when you feel like negotiating with yourself, take immediate action. The moment you start rationalizing why you shouldn’t do something, begin doing it, even though you’d prefer to avoid it. This simple tactic can break through procrastination and keep you on track.
You can support this with routines. That’s a remedy for negotiating with yourself. Because as creatures of habit, humans thrive on consistency. Discipline and establishing strong routines are the key to producing excellent results and attaining goals.
Stop Sabotaging Your Future Self
The message here is: when you negotiate with yourself, you lose every time. Remember, you’re in the real estate game for the long haul, and this self-sabotage is a roadblock to your long-term success.
So, the next time you find yourself using your well-honed negotiation skills against yourself, take a step back, take a time out, and realize that your effort is going to determine your results. The more active and consistent your efforts are, the greater your results will be.
Refuse to negotiate with the part of you that seeks comfort. Instead, allow the part of you that desires success to dominate your decisions. The results will speak for themselves.
