Motivation matters more than anything in a changing market. When the market is hot, transactions happen easily. But in 2025, with shifting conditions, it’s crucial to work with the most motivated clients.
That means, if you’re not asking the right questions, you’re leaving deals on the table.
Here’s how to determine who is ready to buy or sell—plus three essential questions to identify motivation fast.
The Market Has Changed—So Should Your Approach
Real estate is all about timing and motivation. And in today’s market, fewer people are jumping in early. Consider these trends:
- The average first-time homebuyer age has increased from 28 in 1991 to 38 in 2024.
- Repeat homebuyers used to buy again at age 42 in the early ‘90s. In 2024, the average repeat buyer is 61 years old.
- More homeowners are locked into low rates, but people are still moving. 17.2% of homeowners now have a mortgage rate above 6%—double the percentage from two years ago.
So, what’s driving the market? Life changes. People aren’t moving on a whim—they’re moving because they have to. That’s where the right questions come in.
The “D’s” That Signal Motivation
The most motivated clients are those experiencing major life events. When talking to prospects, listen for the D’s—the key drivers behind why people buy and sell:
- Diapers: A growing family needs more space.
- Death: Estate sales and family transitions create selling urgency.
- Diamonds: Engagements and marriages often mean buying a home.
- Divorce: Splits lead to property sales or buyouts.
- Degrees/Diplomas: Empty nesters often downsize after kids move out.
- Default: Financial strain forces homeowners to sell.
- Dogs: Pet owners buy homes for yard space—yes, it’s real!
- Relocation: I know it doesn’t start with a D—but job changes often require a move.
Identifying these factors will help you determine whether a prospect is serious—or just browsing.
The Three Questions That Identify Motivated Buyers and Sellers
To separate the motivated from the maybes, use these three questions in your prospecting:
1. For Buyers: “What got you excited about looking at this home?”
Instead of asking, “What motivated you to call?“ (which can feel pushy), this phrasing gets buyers to talk about their dreams, needs, and urgency.
- Why it works: It keeps the conversation positive and forward-thinking.
- What to listen for: Answers that reveal the “D’s” above—space for a baby, moving for a job, needing a yard for their dog.
2. For Sellers: “Where are you thinking about moving to?”
This question uncovers why they want to sell. If they don’t have a clear reason, they’re likely not ready.
- Why it works: It forces sellers to articulate their motivation.
- What to listen for: Downsizing, relocation, financial strain—anything that signals urgency.
- Pro tip: Add some Phil Jones-style “magic words”: “Just out of curiosity, why are you thinking about moving once your home sells?” Then stop talking and listen.
3. For Both Buyers & Sellers: “What will that do for you?”
This open-ended question gets to the heart of their why. If they struggle to answer, they might not be serious.
- Why it works: It reveals their emotional motivation—why they need to make a move now.
- Bonus tip: If their answer is vague, follow up with: “Tell me more about that.” Then stay quiet and let them talk.
Find the Right Clients, Close More Deals
Asking better questions leads to helping more clients. When you focus on motivation, you’ll spend less time chasing leads and more time closing deals.
