I recently joined a Facebook group for moms in real estate. It was a bit eye-opening to realize how many questions and concerns Realtor moms have. What I realized is Realtor moms are anxious, and anxious about a lot of the same things.
Having been a real estate agent for almost 11 years and a mom for six, here are some things I’ve learned that I hope will encourage you and remind you that you’re doing fine.
1. You need to give yourself a freaking break.
Being a mom is hard. Whether you’re pregnant, holding a newborn, or running after kids from toddler through teen, it’s totally normal not to have the energy, motivation, or will to prospect leads or deal with difficult clients.
We need to normalize moms in real estate taking some time off when needed. It should be okay for moms to have some level of maternity leave. If you have the financial ability, you need to take care of yourself, your kids and your family during this critical time.
Now, I will add the caveat that if you are noticing that you don’t have any motivation or energy to do anything, including care for yourself and your child, if you’re in tears most of the time, or afraid to do anything at all, you may be struggling with some variety of (post-partum) anxiety and depression and you should absolutely seek help from a professional. There is light at the end of that tunnel. I’ve been there. I promise.
2. Set boundaries.
Ring ring…It’s 2018, and my phone goes off at 10:00 p.m. with a random Zillow lead asking about seeing a luxury home in a different city the next morning at 9:00 a.m.
I remember stressing out about meeting this person there in the morning. At the time, my newborn was nursing every two hours. But I also did not want to lose the new lead. As a result, I was up all night, not just with the baby, but also with my thoughts.
Do you know what I’m talking about?
A couple of weeks later I listed a home and decided to ask a top agent in my office to co-list. I needed the extra hands. The first thing I realized was that this woman, who had four teenagers, COULD NOT be reached after 5:00 p.m. I asked her about this since we were in the middle of a negotiation, and she told me something I’ll never forget:
“I have four kids. I work a lot. They deserve time with their mom.”
Huh. Apparently, you can be a top-producing realtor and turn off the phone at a decent hour
Now, this will be controversial among those of you who feel that your clients own you, but I started doing the same. I usually turn off my phone between 6:00 and 7:00 p.m. This has helped me sleep better, be more present with my family, and feel less burnt out and stressed.
I tell my clients up front that this is how I operate and guess what: No one has given me any pushback. If you respect yourself and your boundaries, your clients will too. If they don’t respect this, then you probably won’t want to work with them anyway.
3. Get systems and automations in place to help your business.
Every step I’ve taken to streamline my business has helped me be more productive, professional and successful. This includes using a customer relationship management system (CRM).
Whether you are using ManyChat, a virtual assistant, Zapier, RealScout, Follow Up Boss, etc., get help from tech and AI tools. Just be sure to implement one new tool at a time so you don’t overwhelm yourself.
4. If you’re a brand new #realtormom…
I suggest joining a team, or, at minimum, a full-service brokerage. Real estate is a rough business. Even if you’re getting leads and listings, you need to know how to manage the transactions properly. This requires expertise and experience, and you simply don’t have this.
Are you worried about the splits? A dollar is a dollar. It’s better to make less on a split than lose the deal entirely because you’re too inexperienced and unable to convert the leads. Or worse, you make a mistake that costs your client thousands of dollars.
Lastly, there will be showings at inconvenient times. If you can’t swing it or you have a kid who will just run rampant, having a team member who can do the showing for you will be a blessing.
5. Use your kids to get leads!
That sounds way worse than it is! But as a Realtor mom, you have been given the key to the millennial network. Millennials, at 38%, are the largest group of home buyers right now. You most likely fit into this category.
Use your mom network and become involved with your kid’s school, friend groups, sports teams, hobbies, etc. This will help you get to know more people in the community.
This doesn’t mean you should be throwing your logo and card in everyone’s face at all times. Instead, use these opportunities to network and create new relationships. Older and younger real estate agents will not have these same opportunities!
Bonus tip: When you post on your social media, just show who you are as a working mom in real estate. Be authentic. Now, I post very little about my family on my feed @lagunabeach_jaleesa, largely because of privacy concerns. I use my stories to post parenting memes that appeal to my friends and help create connections and relationships with other moms in my network.
Here are a few other Realtor moms who show parenting in different stages alongside running a business:
- @heatheroneill.realestate
- @ashleyyramseyy
- @amygregory
- @myrealtorjantzee
- @heathermaddoxhomes
- @thechelseacobler
- @sellingwithtaylor
6. Figure out your priorities (and stop comparing yourself to others).
If you’ve secretly stalked that top real estate mom on Instagram who looks like she is doing it all—always dressed up, selling fancy listings, and perfectly manicured kids in color-coordinated neutrals—remember that it’s just a perfectly designed image on social media.
No matter what these moms might be posting, they are struggling with all the same things you are. No one has perfect kids, a perfect business or a perfect life. Don’t compare yourself to anyone else or their carefully crafted public image.
You need to find out what your priorities are at this moment in time. Then accept that you’ve made a decision to run your business and life the way that best suits your family, and that it might look very different from someone else’s way of doing things. There is no use in comparing yourself to someone else.
And believe me… I am still learning this as well.
These are just my 6 tips for Realtor moms, addressing some of the biggest concerns we all have.
Remember, you’re doing great. Remember that you are a mom first. Remember that we all struggle with mom guilt and finding “balance.” Remember that it’s OK to ask for help.
The most important thing is that you’re out there and you’re trying. You’re working to do the best thing for your family. And that makes you a great Realtor mom. Not your production. Not your ‘top producer status’. But your desire to be a good mom. Because that’s what good moms do.
