How many unanswered texts does it take before you stop following up?
One?
Two?
Five?
If you’re Ryan Serhant, the answer is simple:
“Until they buy or they die.”
It’s one of his most famous lines, but recently on the Playmaker’s Podcast with RealScout CEO Andrew Flachner, he shared the philosophy behind it, and the story that proves he actually lives by it.
Let’s break it down.
The Give, Give, Give, Give, Ask Formula
When asked what the script is for someone following up, Serhant said it boils down to this:
“Give, give, give, give, ask.”
“It’s always giving. All of my follow-ups. Even now, all of my follow-ups—and my follow-ups now are with very unique people.”
It’s the actual sequence he says he runs on every relationship, from active leads to the private wealth managers and attorneys he works with regularly.
Nowhere in this “give” sequence is there a “just checking in” script.
Here’s what “giving” might include:
- Recent comparables
- Interesting news
- Market information
Serhant explained why this type of information is valuable to consumers:
“Follow up is simple. It’s market information and know-how you have because you happen to be in this space, because you do this all day long. Your clients, predominantly, probably don’t do this all day long. They probably have other jobs. And they’re busy.”
Most of the time, Serhant doesn’t ask for a response to these messages. He’s staying present so he’s the first call when a lead is ready to move. The goal is simply to stay visible until the client decides it’s time.
The Three F’s Behind the Formula
Serhant built his follow-up habit around what he calls the three F’s:
- Follow up, so you’re the first call when someone’s ready to decide
- Follow through, so people can count on you to actually do what you said you’d do
- Follow back, so nobody in your network gets left hanging
He sums up his commitment to the habit in one line.
“I follow up with everyone until they buy or they die.”
It’s a commitment to staying in the conversation regardless of how long that takes. And one of Serhant’s clients put it to a five-year test.
The Client Who Went Dark for Five Years, Then Bought for $16M
Serhant first connected with the client years before the sale. What followed was five years of total silence on the client’s end, and Serhant never once asked for anything during that stretch.
He gave five or six “gives,” in his words, before he ever slipped in a question, and the one question he did ask was some version of, “Do you want to see this?”
Five years later, the client responded out of nowhere.
“Hey, sorry, been a little busy. Can we chat?”
Four days after that message, the client closed on a penthouse. The sale price was $16 million.
Why Silence Doesn’t Mean No
Clients aren’t in the real estate business every day. They have their own jobs and their own lives that often have nothing to do with you.
Silence from a client usually just means the timing hasn’t lined up yet. Stay in touch without pressure, and you’re still a name they remember when they’re ready to make a move.
A name they associate with no-strings helpfulness, not empty “pick me” scripts.
If you’re looking for ideas beyond “just checking in,” BAM has already put together 24 ready-made conversation starters you can use with active leads, past clients, and your sphere. Pick one, send it today, and let consistency do the heavy lifting.
Save the list. Pick one starter and send it today. The next message you send could be the one that pays off four days from now, or four years.
